Here I am again attempting to condense and cram the 150,000 carefully crafted and deeply thought-out words of book three into one garbled and confusing page of text.
Obviously this page contains spoilers for Book Three.
In the third instalment of Almost Eternal, vampires and witches reach an agreement as the world around them loses its head.
A few more people die. There are more news stories. I kill you all with cringe at least three times. The screenshots are pretty damn good in some places, if you squint. I finally purchase an image editor for special effects, but still end up doing most of it in MS paint because I easily get overwhelmed by all the shiny new buttons.
We opened with Seth babbling almost as incoherently as I do as Faith tries desperately to understand what the fuck just happened and why he’s suddenly scared of cats.
It is revealed that Lilith and Sage go way back, but no way is Sage letting Caleb leave her sight until she has April, especially after it was revealed that the bloodthirsty blonde may actually be Wyatt’s daughter.
Sage swiftly blows up the Vatore Cottage and takes April and Melinda in, where the girls, safe and hidden, start to thrive.
Wyatt tentatively begins to bond with the girl who he may or may not have inadvertently created that one time in that closet with Sandy nineteen years prior.
It was a man!
Seth finally regains his mental faculties and becomes even more obsessed with whatever-the-heck power Faith has that is causing him to not only pry open his own mind, but also causing this goddamn ache in his chest area every time he looks at her.
Faith is having a great time, banging rock stars and seeing her face all over the TV as she navigates unlife with her ‘Murderbear’.
Meanwhile, a certain distant memory resurfaces…
With her brother safe and isolated under Sage’s watch and literally no other excuse to cling to, Lilith resumes her hunt for the plasma fruit, via a few bars. After one particularly heavy session she throws up in Broof’s flowerbed, insults his dead daughter and yet somehow manages to form an uneasy truce with the rubbish witch.
Jessica is released from the Tower into the waiting arms of the GliTS. Feeling safety may be in numbers and that their theories may not be as far from the mark as she’d originally believed, she seeks to join them.
Their hazing rituals include an initiation night in the Forgotten Hollow forests, where Jessica makes a translucent new friend – and a horrifying discovery.
After learning that strong emotional responses tend to lower Faith’s resistance to his mind-meddling, Seth takes Faith to visit her sister, Joy. Faith cannot resist a swift a cuddle with a tearful Joy which quickly takes a sinister turn.
Seth manages to intervene, but the damage is done. Broken and ashamed, Seth manages to take what he wanted from Faith but with her eyes opened, Faith finally realises that he has been manipulating her all along.
Caleb is still screwing up everything he touches and has another less-than-earthshattering experience with his vampire bride, inadvertently breaking the bind.
Wyatt finally sees the vampire’s true colours and blasts him, butt-naked, through the magical barrier designed to keep him put.
Wyatt learns the hard way that his magic has consequences and we kiss goodbye to Sage.
Is Caleb gone for good? Is April finally free? Will Lilith ever walk past a pub without going in?
Find out in Book Four.
“Actually this sounds fun and I wanna read Book Three!”
Almost Eternal 