The tour bus hadnât made it five miles from Windenburg before it had conked out again. Caustic had flat-out refused to spend yet another night on a bus with no electricity and, after the dismal turnout of last nightâs gig, he wasnât about to perform another in this dead-end corner of the world. A guy had to make a living, after all.
Fortunately for the band, the fancy hotels in these parts hadnât yet had the pleasure of a Kaz Traitors makeover and the Glimmerbrook Grand was more than happy to allow them to stay the night. For free. Which was just as well as Caustic would never let on, but the band was seriously in the hole, money-wise.
âThatâs the fifth set of keys youâve lost this month,â Blu tutted in her âMumâ tone. âWeâll have to get you fitted with a microchip, like those cats who always lose their collars.â


Was that supposed to be funny? Caustic wasnât sure but made an amused sound, just in case. Didnât want to upset his prize cow now, did he?
âYou have no idea where you lost them?â Nani asked in her irritating voice.
He shrugged. âNo, otherwise Iâd find them. I probably dropped them in the toilets when I was—â he stopped himself abruptly, taking into account his present company. âWhen I was shitting,â he finished with a deadpan expression.

Predictably, both women disapproved. âThatâs disgusting,â Nani grimaced.
âWhy? We all shit. Donât pretend that you donât shit, Nani.â Caustic fixed her with a steely stare, trying to hold his tongue. He failed. âUnless you really do have a huge stick up your arse, of course.â

He relished it, that beat of hurt, but not for long as the freckled imp had appeared and hopped into the tub beside her bandmates.
âWoah, did I walk in at a fun moment?â Floppy grinned. âWho has a stick up their bum? Can I have one?â

âNo one has a stick anywhere; just your cousin being a jerk, as per usual,â Nani muttered. âI canât believe I ever dated him.â
âI canât believe youâre not over it. We broke up days ago.â


âLeave her alone, homewrecker,â Floppy cut in, staring him down with those eyes that always seemed to be looking in slightly different directions. âSome people have feelings. Not everyone is a brainless penis like you.â
Floppy had a great way of saying things without actually saying things. Caustic shot her a look of pure hatred but it was too late.
âWhat do you mean by that?â Nani asked.

Floppy didnât even blink. âPenis; itâs an organ most men have. It dangles, pokes you in the eye occasionally—“


“I know what a penis is, Floppy.” Nani sucked in a breath; her patience always tested by her bandmate. âI meant the other thing you said,â she clarified, oblivious to Caustic’s mimicry behind her.
âBrainless?â Floppy asked innocently. âThatâs this,â she said and closed her eyes, remaining completely still and silent.
âHomewrecker, you annoying bitch! Why are you a homewrecker, Caustic? Why is he a homewrecker, Floppy?â Nani asked, but Floppy remained âbrainlessâ much to Naniâs chagrin.


Ever the peacekeeper, Blu stepped in before Nani throttled Floppy. âWhat does she mean by that, Caustic?â she asked carefully. âWhat relationship did you⊠oh. Oh no. Tell me you didnât, not with Violet.â

For most of his life, Caustic had been the ugly, skinny guy that most women wouldnât touch with a bargepole. Also, he was currently sitting next to a woman who had ripped his heart out and chewed it up, so even though he knew heâd get a roasting from Bluebell, he found it incredibly hard not brag about his sexual conquest.
âWhy not? She was hot as hell and well up for it.â

Nani had turned away, but he could hear her eyes rolling. She shook her head and rose from the water, the water highlighting all of her pale curves. Caustic tried not to ogle her, even though her perfect tits were right in his face and something else was attempting to rise from the water. He prepared himself for an almighty slap.
But nothing happened; she just climbed out of the tub like he didnât exist.


Ouch.
He stared at Floppy, a sure way to make any budding erection die, but could still see Naniâs shapely, wet butt from the corner of his eye.
He reminded himself that she had dumped him and that she deserved a little heartache, too. âWoah! Careful where you point that thing! Nearly knocked me out with your arse stick there, Nani.â
Nothing. Not even a huff.

Blu was still staring at him like he was an alien and she regretted getting on his spaceship.
âYou canât keep doing this,â she said.
âHey, she dumped me—â
âNo, not Nani. Well yes, Nani too, but I meant sleeping with our fans. They look up to us; itâs an abuse of your position.â
Now that was funny. Caustic snorted. âWhatâs the problem?â
âWhatâs the problem?!â Blu repeated, âMum Modeâ fully switched on again. âFirstly, she was barely an adult.â

âShe was barely an adult, Carlos,â Floppy parroted.
Bluâs eye twitched, but she didnât bite. âAnd second,â she continued in a low hiss, âwhat about her fella?â
âYeah, what about her fella, Carlos?â Floppy asked.
Blu sighed. âDo you have to do that now, Floppy?â

Caustic shrugged. âWhat about him? He left not long after you did. Looked like death â that guy cannot handle his drink⊠or his woman.â
Blu balked. âHe looked like death and you just let him go?!â
âYou just let him go, Carlos?â Floppy asked, with none of the same outrage Bluâs words held.
Bluâs famous patience was finally being tested. She gritted her teeth. âIâll pinch you, Floppy.â
âOoh! Where? On the nipple?â

For the second time in as many minutes, Caustic was treated to the sight of another curvaceous backside leaving his hot tub.
âIâve had enough,â Blu muttered. âYou two need to start thinking about other people. Iâm gonna see if Naniâs OK then Iâm gonna check the venue and hope Violetâs fella is not dead in a gutter somewhere around it.â

Caustic so wanted to say something, but he knew that without Blu, there was no band. Anyone could learn a few chords and mess up riffs on stage, but heâd never met anyone else with those lungs.
âYeah, you do that,â he said weakly, glaring at Floppy, hoping that sheâd apologise. He should have known better than to place any hope on his cousin, though.
âGet me a SacFondles meal while youâre out, Blu,â Floppy said, grinning until the door slammed.

Alone in the hot tub with his cousin, Caustic could finally relax. Floppy was the coolest person heâd ever met and heâd always loved hanging out with her. She wasnât bothered by anything, as her next question demonstrated.
âThe boyfriend looked like death, did he?â she asked, her eyes sparkling. âWarm death, or cold? Any entrails hanging out?â
Caustic chuckled at his manic relative. He knew her well enough to know exactly what she meant by this.

âWhy do I get the feeling that his sudden illness was something to do with you, dear cousin?â he played along.
If rockstardom fell through, Floppy would make a great professional poker player, he thought. Or a great assassin.
âIs it because youâre projecting your guilty conscience on to me, Carlos?â she asked. âSleeping with a willing fan. Oh my golly-gosh. Thereâs a warm seat in hell for you.â

Caustic roared, his laugh shaking the tub. âIâm devil incarnate, for sure,â he agreed. âFor real though, what did you give him? Laxatives or something?â
âYes. I wanted him to rush in midway to ruin your gentsâ room rendezvous with his missus.â She smiled. âYouâre into poo games played with angry beaus, right?â
His face fell as he read between her lines. âSo what did you give him?â he asked warily. âShit, Floppy,â he whispered. âWas it a roofie?â
She blinked slowly. âIsnât that the top of a house? How could I give him that? Silly Carlos!” she said splashing her hands. “The chimney would get lodged in his throat.â

âFloppy, for fuckâs sake. You didnât need to drug him â she really wanted me.”
Floppy threw her head back and loudly cried out, âOh yes! Yes, Carlos! Give it to me you scrawny, pink-haired troll! My whole life has led up to this very moment! Yes! Yes! OH YES!â
Caustic watched his cousin as she took the piss out of him. She thrashed about for a while, jerked and then sank back into the tub as if spent.
âYou done?â he asked.

âIâve had better.â Floppy fanned herself, still wearing that impish little grin.
âSo why drug him? Were you trying to bed him?â
âI like my men wriggling and screaming âwhat are you gonna do with that cucumber?!â but glazed over on the tarmac was a fun change.â
It wasnât often that Floppy made no sense to him, but Caustic didnât know where she going with this. âSo⊠what did you do it for then? And was it a tranquiliser? What if he wakes up and goes to the police, Floppy? What the fuck do we do then?â
Floppy laughed and splashed him.

âThen you will be in very deep trouble, wonât you?â she laughed. âYouâre a bad, bad man, Carlos! Feeding strange men house parts so you can play weird bum games with their girlfriends! Wait âtil I tell your Mum!â
âAre you shitting me?â Caustic growled. âYou spiked a guyâs drink to get me in trouble? Floppy, he could go to the police â or the press!â

She smiled looking around. âHey look! Thereâs a dead dog hanging from the chandelier! Ha! Made you look!â she laughed as he fleetingly glanced upwards, despite knowing it was nonsense.
âFloppy, listen to me—“
âNo, Carlos. You listen to me,â she grinned, swishing the water about. âYou really didnât recognise her while you were knobbing her, did you? She had a face; did you know that?â

âShould I have recognised her?â Caustic asked, dread weighing him down. His voice was a low rasp as he tried to fathom exactly how huge his mistake might have been. âShit⊠sheâs not related to us is she?â Floppy shrugged, that mischievous glint in her eye. âIs she?â Caustic continued; an octave higher. âFuck, Floppy! You shouldâve said something!â
âI did, but it was like you were in a trance or something. BooooooobiesâŠâ she groaned like a zombie. âAnd youâve porked her now, so itâs too late; prepare for mutant offspring.â
âI used a johnny,â he lied.

Floppy laughed. âSo did my dad.â
He breathed a sigh of relief as he interpreted this to mean that whoever Violet, Fanny or whatever her name was, she wasnât a relative. âGive me a clue.â
âOoh! OK!â Floppy squealed. âThe girl you were slobbering all over last night has been all over the news but she ainât the logo.â
That helped him approximately 0%. What had been on the news lately? Was there an election going on? There was always an election going on.
âIs she a politician?â he asked.

Not a politician, then. What else had been on the news? âThe only other thing on the news has been that Sandy Moss thing.â Floppy continued to stare so Caustic continued to talk. âSandy was murdered and her daughter went missing, right? Whatâs that got to do with anything?â
Floppy shook her head. âBeats me.â
He wracked his brain trying to think of any way Violet/Fanny could be involved with that story.
April had been kidnapped, or was missing, along with two of her friends.
Her friends.

âSheâs Aprilâs friend!â he announced.
âOr kidnapper,â Floppy said. âOr murderer. But if I murdered April Moss, Iâd wear her face.â
Suddenly, it all made sense. Caustic took a huge breath. âYou were going to turn them in, werenât you?â
âTurn them into what? A multi-million simoleon reward? We don’t need that,â she sneered. âOh well. The streets are full of murderers, whatâs another few? Plus, you got your little dickie inside a little chickie! Cluck cluck!â


Well, fuck.

Lilith settled her umpteenth cosmopolitan on the bar and allowed her gaze to once again settle on Chuckâs face. She could stare at him all night.
Heâd been staying a hotel â the doghouse heâd called it, with a soft chuckle. Her heart ached for him. Did Babs not realise what she had? How sweet he was? How kind? How warm and soft and—

The words had tumbled out before Lilith had chance to think them through.
âYou could come and stay at my place?â
He paused part way through the sentence he was saying; Lilith didnât even know what that was. He looked⊠confused.

Lilith cleared her throat. âIn Calebâs room,â she clarified, trying to backtrack up the cliff sheâd just dived off.
Chuck pouted and in that instant, Lilith really wanted to kiss him. She bit her lip, waiting for his answer, but of course, she could already hear what it was.
âLilith, I really appreciate the gesture, but Babs already thinks thereâs something going on between us. If I moved in⊠well I could likely kiss my marriage goodbye,â he explained softly.
Lilith wasnât sure what was coming over her tonight; perhaps she was still suffering the effects of whatever it was Wyatt gave her, but she blinked shyly and asked in a small voice, âIs she wrong?â

He looked puzzled, naturally. âWrong to throw me out?â
âIs she wrong to think there’s something between us?â Lilith whispered, watching him take a sharp breath, hearing his heartbeat getting faster. There was no going back up this cliff now. She was broken against the rocks.

He shuffled in his seat, finally finding structure to his thoughts.
Oh my word, here they come.

âLilith, Iâm flattered,â he said softly. âYou’re an intelligent, beautiful woman and I’d be lying if I… but Iâm happily married. Well, Iâm married, I suppose we have been happier, but even if I wasnât married, youâre young enough to beâ”
âIâm 321, Chuck.â
âYes, well. So you are. In that case, perhaps Iâm too young for you? I donât know where Iâm going with this.â He hesitated, looked at the bar. “I’m married,” he finished firmly.
âWhat if she doesnât take you back?â Lilith asked.

He moved to comfort her, but quickly changed his mind. âEven if Babs filed for divorce tomorrow â and I very much hope that isnât the case because I truly love that woman – I would need time alone, I would need to heal before I could even consider another relationship.â
âI could help you,â she sobbed. She sounded so desperate but right now, sheâd beg if she had to.
He sighed softly. âAnd what kind of relationship would that give us? A rebound one. You deserve a fulfilling, mutual love, Lilith.â

Lilith didnât know what she deserved.
âI just⊠I⊠bollocks.â There really were no words to offer a man whose marriage youâd just attempted to destroy. Lilith started a few explanations but it was Chuckâs soft, completely unnecessary apology that finally sent her running out of the door in shame.

She gave it a few minutes, hoping that heâd follow to pull her into his embrace and tell her that heâd changed his mind; that he wanted her, to hell with the consequences.


But Chuck would never do that. He wouldnât throw away what he had on the off-chance of something better. He didnât build false expectations.
That was, Lilith realised, exactly why she liked him.
And now sheâd completely bloody blown it. Not only did she have to go back to an empty house, alone, but she had, at worst, lost her kin a blood donor and, at best, made it awkward for any future time she was around Chuck. Or Melinda, for that matter.

She rubbed her head, trying to stimulate her fuzzy brain.
This situation couldn’t get any worse.















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17 responses to “Chapter 3.18 – Deep Trouble”
Bom! A lot of cliffhangers. Relatives? Humiliation? Kitty?
Not many hopeful peeps in this chapter đ
There were hopeful peeps! There was⊠and there was⊠um. Maybe next chapter.
Ugh! I admit I totally forgot about the reward thing with everything else that’s going on! DX Floppy sure has weird methods, though. She could’ve just called the cops first thing. …then again, even just her way of speaking gives me a headache. Who knows what she’s thinking? I mean, except you, Watcher. ;D
Whoops, Lilith. Talk about dumpster fire. I don’t think Chuck will refuse to help the vamps, even if only for Melinda, but still. The awkward is definitely there.
…and there goes my hope of a witch child. …or wait. Does it? I mean… shapeshifting isn’t exactly a vampire power, now, is it? When the GliTS mentioned the three supernaturals that allegedly frequented Forgotten Hollow, could two of them have actually been one person/being? Anyway, dang. She looks like she sorely regrets leading Faith where she led her right about now, though. XD What, did the itty bitty fledgeling throw a wrench in some plans? …still, though. I feel like I’m back in deep water. First I had no clue what Seth was planning, now I have no clue about Kat’s thought process…. except… I have this feeling maybe her being actually helpful might have something to do with the fact it was girls she was helping. Being from the time she is from… she’s probably had her fair share of jerks in her life. Maybe she and Faith share that guy-hating thing?
Floppy is the epitome of weird. Seth couldnât follow her thoughts, either. She probably should have just called the cops. Maybe she did, but they didnât understand what she was on about, so she had to get creative. Either way, Caustic is certainly wishing that he hadnât treated Faith like trash now.
Itâs highly unlikely that Chuck will abandon them, correct, but Lilith always goes straight to doom.
Basing your theory on what the GliTS said is dangerous territory, but if we roll with that then no, no reason they couldnât be the same thing, or that maybe they got some wires crossed. Kitty definitely experienced her fair share of jerks in her lifetime. But yes, interesting questions that I canât answer, but maybe someone canâŠ
Haha, yeah, it is very likely no stranger could make heads or tails of anything Floppy says. So… yeah, the cops probably wouldn’t have taken her seriously. Unless she can talk “normal human” and just doesn’t bother because she knows Caustic gets her native tongue. ;D
True enough! XD
Hmm… yeah, I guess Kathryn may have dropped a few hints about her thought process to /someone/ but I ain’t asking him any questions about that! That would just feel so rude. …unless of course he’s plotting something concerning her. Which of course he’ll do, he hasn’t bought the “it’s just a cat” for a second… heheh. XDD
As to the crossed wires. Ha. So let’s get the facts untangled. Kathryn is a vampire. But that rainbow light sure looked a lot like Wy’s light show. That looked like witch magic, alright. Now, if Kathryn had a witch spell put on her, would it have activated on contact with Faith’s power? Faith is a mirror. So, she reflects what goes towards her. If Kathryn had been cursed, it is unlikely that curse would reach out to Faith. From that, I would conclude that it was Kathryn, actively trying to use witch magic on Faith. Could she, as a vampire, use witch magic? Is it possible for a vampire to use witch magic? Well, I guess we should ask April and Sage, huh?
I wasn’t planning to make the ‘band taking any potential findings to the police’ a big on-camera scene, but now I want to write about Floppy with the police so badly. The proper, scary police, not Jessica, she’d probably understand what Floppy was on about.
It was just a cat… until it wasn’t.
The light sure did look like Wyatt’s lights, didn’t it. How curious. I’m sure Sage will be able to help. đ
*giggles* Will she? I mean, I guess the two issues are a bit connected. On the general level of “can a vampire use witch magic under any circumstance”… but IÂŽm guessing there would be a difference between a vampire who had been born a witch, like April, and a normal vampire who just drinks witch blood like Melinda now and Lilith, before. And I was super careful about wording my query! đ I mean, wouldnÂŽt want Auntie Sage to figure out what all IÂŽm on to… or /up to/ for that matter… *laughs* ;D
Finally some answers! So Floppy is the culprit. Can’t help myself but admire the girl’s quick and practical thinking, even though she seems a tiny unstable, or maybe not unstable but too ahead of everyone else?đ€
There goes my ship. Then again, you as the author know better than us readers what we really need. Because it wouldn’t be the Chuck we know and love if he accepted Lilith’s offer. Yeah, I think in this case the satisfaction would only be very brief, because then what? No, Chuck must stay true to his character and maintain his integrity. Which means while part of me may be disappointed by the outcome, the whole me really isn’t if that makes any sense to anyone else but me… We can move on now and find another ship, more viable one hopefully!
Also, I love how you make even the last side character an interesting personality with quirks. Good job.
Answers (that bring about more questions). Floppy is a tad unstable, yes.
He wouldnât be Chuck if he dropped everything and ran off with Lilith, as much fun as that might have been youâre right, it would be fleeting and overall unsatisfying. Now we just need to find some more ships in this ocean graveyard.
Oh and Kat seems rather surprised by her sudden change into a human. Could it be that she had been cursed by the witches or a (particular) witch, under a spell that kept her in the cat form? And interacting with Faith’s vampire magic cancelled the spell somehow and let her loose?
Hot damn, Maladi. đ
So it wasnât Caustic that drugged Seth, but Floppy. That immediately lifted him from “obliterate-by-dragons” territory to just a general dislike. Youâre not as terrible as I thought you were, Goatee Man. Floppy is really something, though. If not for Caustic interpreting then I would not have been able to make heads or tails of her explanation. I wonder if Caustic is going to try and find Faith now, to get to the money. Good luck finding her again though. đ¶
Ouch⊠Lilith. Stop. Donât. Lilith. Aaaah no she did đ Chuck is being very kind as expected but ouch. Even a gentle rejection still hurts when youâre that desperate. I have a lot of thoughts about Lilith and why she fell for Chuck and what is left in her mind about Seth but itâs all a jumble at the moment and it wonât come out right. Iâll try again in a future chapter.
Either way I canât imagine Chuck no longer offering his help to Sage over this. Heâs caring enough and one of her âkinâ is his own daughter â he wouldnât turn tail like that. I wouldnât be surprised if he acts like that conversation never happened.
So the cat really was Bob! I was flip-flopping between her, Angeline (somehow) and a witchâs familiar. Looks like Bob won out there â but she doesnât look happy at all, which means that whatever this is, itâs likely not something that she chose. I wonder if a witch turned her into an animal against her will. If so, which one was it? Sage? Ma? The unidentified high priestess? Or someone else entirely?
Faithâs touch must have dispelled whatever magic was on her. Maybe itâs the mirror effect casting the same spell again, and that cancelâs each other out? Or she has some other power besides allure and her turning peopleâs power against each other. I wonder if Bob was aware of herself as a cat, or if she had the mind of a cat while being stuck as one. It would explain why she hung around Seth and even led Faith to him when she knew he was in danger. We donât know enough about Bob to completely rule out either one at this point.
The magic effects this chapter were great! I loved the one where sheâs transforming with the moon above her and the one with swirly magic around her outstretched fingers đ€©
Aww, ânot as bad as I thoughtâ almost sounds like a compliment amongst all the insults the characters usually wade through. Nope, heâs not the one who drugged Seth, just a guy who used that to his advantage. And Floppy, yeah. Sheâs⊠fun to write for lol.
Ooh! Tangly thoughts! I look forward to hearing them in the future. âI wouldnât be surprised if he acts like that conversation never happened.â then you will not be surprised. đ
Another stab in the majors. You lot are on form today. I cannot tell you the answers, but I can tell you that you will find them out soon-ish!
Magic effects! Effects are definitely not my strong suit but at least they got the message across – and they conveniently censored Kittyâs nakedness too. Win-win.
Floppy! <3
Now I'm wondering how she got the name…
I wonder what Caustic is going to do with his new info of who Faith is. "Hey, cops, I, uh, porked this… No! I'm not calling you pigs! (even if you are) Anyway, see I banged this hot chick, and I think…" LOL "No, I don't know where she went, but she's with this guy who might be dead. Don't ask me how I know. Guess if he's dead that would mean she wasn't still with him, but…"
I do apologize. I have some late-night sillies cuz I gotta stay up til midnight because my son doesn't know he's supposed to check transmission fluid in a car. And this is after he burned up his previous car's engine from not adding oil when it needed it. So I gotta haul his butt to and from work.
So was Floppy intending to go for a ride on Seth's joystick as he was passed out in the alley? Did she? If so, did he finish?
Hm, so Faith might've gotten some kind of something to undo stuff. (yes that makes perfect sense the way I phrased it) And the kitty is the Kitty! Well, that proves my brain picked up on something after all. It actually makes me kinda nervous cuz what will she do now? And I'm also kinda sad it wasn't Angeline, something I'd hoped to be true and that she'd somehow faked her death or the person who killed her (think I know who) didn't really kill her (but probably did đ ) and that it made her LOOK dead. /sigh.
Oh Lilith! She has the worst luck. I knew Chuck wouldn't go for it, but there was that tiny hope still anyway. Now things are AWKward.
How did she get her name? Strange parents.
Just about died laughing at the scene you painted of Caustic at the police station there. Any time you wanna write a comment on the late-night sillies is fine by me.LOL. No, Floppy wasn’t planning a ride but ooh, such an interesting question at the end there. đ
That makes perfect sense to me. Yeah, sorry, Angeline is dead. Although perhaps we haven’t seen the last of her, shall we say.
I can’t even talk about Lilith. That woman makes me cringe almost as much as her brother does.
The article is very good, I will recommend it to my friends.
They will think you’ve gone insane.